I should have….

in Depression|Me with 12 Comments written by

My sophomore year of College I was in search of getting connected to something.
Idealy I wanted to be apart of a youth ministry where I could serve and be mentored by the youth leaders. I went to the source of connecting eager college students to youth ministry’s looking for volunteers, Rondel Ramsey (Lincoln Christian College Youth Min Prof and the Man). He connected me with this guy named John Luzadder. I thought he had a cool name so we set up a time to meet.

He was a little more intense about the meeting than I expected. I was thinking “dude, settle down. I am just volunteering on Wednesday nights.” But he was doing his due diligence in making sure that this was a good fit for the both of us.
Needless to say, it didn’t work out. Everything was in place for me to start serving on Wednesday nights and possibly Sunday mornings, but I didn’t do it, I chickened out. Well, I wouldn’t call it chickening out, I would call it not wanting to go through the process of driving to Springfield, being uncomfortable and having to be the new guy trying to learn and disciple others at the same time. I know, pretty pathetic.
John went onto work at CIY and I am still sitting in my parents basement.

You ever just wish you could go back in time and change some things?
This is one of those big things I wish I would have done differently. Not because John started to work for CIY and he would have taken me with him (though I wouldn’t be opposed to that), but because I was unwilling to step out and move with God. I was to concerned about my own comfort and was not ready to learn. I missed out on a great opportunity to be stretched, challenged, and taught by a great leader.

John, if for some reason you are reading this or someone tells you about this,
I am sorry for not saying yes. You took a lot of time out of your schedule to meet with me and discuss the possibilities. You were willing to mentor and disciple me.
But I was not to willing at the time. I missed out on what God was going to do through you.

I am curious….Is there something you wish you would have said yes to or did differently?

*Kyle

About Kyle Reed: I create websites, conversations, and ideas. Advocate for the 20 somethings. Looking to connect everyone to a mentor. I like my coffee black and my dog Jack. I currently live in Nashville and find whatever excuse I can to travel to St. Louis

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  • http://tyhuze.wordpress.com tyler

    When I did my internship at MCC (Manchester) John L. was the youth minister at the time. He was a great guy and possibly the most badass youth minister I ever worked with… I'm probably rubbing salt into the wound Kyle, but yeah, you missed out big time.

    • klreed

      great, that made it way worse.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/klreed189 klreed189

      Thanks for making me feel better tyler, I appreciate it

  • http://www.mandarin21.blogspot.com mandy

    Not gonna lie…Luzadder is awesome to work with. I totally agree with tyler. However, he's a cool enough guy to not hold that against you for your life and will pretty likely forgive you and who knows? Maybe you'll have an opportunity arise with CIY or something someday.

  • http://twitter.com/joshua_w_hunt @joshua_w_hunt

    I worked on the ICTC team with Luzadder…simply amazing. Am i adding more salt to the wound that Tyler already filled up? yep. but that's what's great about this…kick someone while they're down and then build them up…that's how we do things right? ha!

    I visited with John while he was in town for the most recent CIY event at the Family Arena and he told me to email him my portfolio because he knew someone that had a job for me…I chickened out too. I didn't want to move from the STL area. Do I regret it? Sort of…but I made my bed and I will lay in it.

    Don't dwell on something like this. if all i did was sit around and dwell on the opportunities i missed out on in the past, i'll probably miss a few opportunities that are right in front of my face at the current moment. I remember turning down so many ministry opportunities while in college and I regret 75% of the one's I turned down. I didn't want to get out of 'comfort zone' and didn't want to give up my freedom I had while in college. Now I wish I would have accepted as many of those ministry opportunities as possible. But now I hold my head high and press on towards the goal….remembering what i've learned from my past experiences and try to live my life without any regrets.

    Yes, reflect upon this when deciding on future opportunities, but don't dwell on it.

  • Josh

    I worked on the ICTC team with Luzadder…simply amazing. Am i adding more salt to the wound that Tyler already filled up? yep. but that's what's great about this…kick someone while they're down and then build them up…that's how we do things right? ha!

    I visited with John while he was in town for the most recent CIY event at the Family Arena and he told me to email him my portfolio because he knew someone that had a job for me…I chickened out too. I didn't want to move from the STL area. Do I regret it? Sort of…but I made my bed and I will lay in it.

    Don't dwell on something like this. if all i did was sit around and dwell on the opportunities i missed out on in the past, i'll probably miss a few opportunities that are right in front of my face at the current moment. I remember turning down so many ministry opportunities while in college and I regret 75% of the one's I turned down. I didn't want to get out of 'comfort zone' and didn't want to give up my freedom I had while in college. Now I wish I would have accepted as many of those ministry opportunities as possible. But now I hold my head high and press on towards the goal….remembering what i've learned from my past experiences and try to live my life without any regrets.

    Yes, reflect upon this when deciding on future opportunities, but don't dwell on it.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/klreed189 klreed189

      That is good stuff there. Thanks for the kick in the gut then the building up. Hope you and I can step out of our comfort zone.

  • Andy Unnerstall

    Speaking of comfort zones………..
    I kind of feel like you were writing this to me.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/klreed189 klreed189

      I didn't think about that. But now that you mentioned it, you are right, it is directed at you.

  • http://twitter.com/joshua_w_hunt @joshua_w_hunt

    you want to get out of a comfort zone…be a beer man. after commenting, i just thought more about this blog and what is something that made me get out of my comfort zone…being a beer man has truly done that…so i'm not shy…but standing up in front of thousands of strangers every home game is more intimidating than one may think…it made me be a bit more animated, outgoing and has really alloyed for me to learn a technique of just talking to a stranger with nothing more in common than the sport of baseball…..and i guess beer too. so maybe the main topic of this might not be 'regret' or 'apologizing' but 'breaking comfort zones'

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/klreed189 klreed189

      Good point, maybe I should become a beer man. I think you are right, it should be more about breaking out of comfort zone than regret.

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