I use to run 5 miles every other day. At least I use to run 5 miles every other day until it got cold outside. Running and under 32 degree weather do not mix. It is scientifically proven (I barely passed physical science). Really it comes down to the matter that cold weather and me do not mix. I tend to hide under blankets and layers of clothes when the winter seasons show their ugly faces. Now that we have officially moved into a new season and spring is upon us (81 degrees in STL yesterday, craziness) I have started running again. You can imagine that getting back on the horse is harder then ever. I am struggling to find motivation to get out there and run. I needed something to push me. Maybe the motivation showed up in the form of my favorite starbucks barista Gina (don’t tell her though) or maybe Don Miller was my motivation. Whatever it was, I needed motivation to start and I need that motivation to help me continue.
About two months ago Don Miller had a face-lift, well at least his website had a face-lift. With the development of his new blog he decided to give away a free copy of his talk that he gave on his most recent book tour. Having the chance to read his new book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, and see him speak live at Greenville College on said book tour I jumped at the opportunity to get a free copy of that talk (you can get it here). I realized that this was going to accompany me on my runs. As I was running yesterday morning listening to Don talk about the story that we are told to live, this idea that life is suppose to be solvable, that happiness is five easy steps away, I started to wonder what kind of life I was pursuing? What story am I living. Later that day I read 2 Thessalonians 1:3-4 and was challenged with what I was thankful for. I could not help but wonder if I was thankful for the story that I was living?
Often times I tend to day dream about what my story could be like.
Usually having it play out in my mind in a perfect world only to be brought back to reality with the life I am living right now. I would see the situation I am in now as never enough, even pathetic at times. I can remember sitting at my desk staring at my computer in a trance because I had nothing to do, no where to go, and nothing to care about. I am slowly working out of this trance to see the story that I am living right now. There is no daydreaming, no hoping about what could be, just living right now.
Its tough, because when I dreamed, I would always dream in complete sentences. Everything was put together. On the metaphor point scale my dreaming was not in its pre-adolescent stage (2 out of 10) of planning, it was living in a nice retirement home (10 out of 10). I would move so far so fast that I literally would play out situations before they even happened. The problem was, these dreams were really not a reality. That is the problem with dreaming, it happens so fast. I never have a dream at night that last for a week. Instead it ends when I wake up. My story though, my everyday life, it takes weeks, even months to take place. I hate that. Dreaming are so much easier to do, but dreaming is not living.
Instead of dreaming I am living. I am living my story one step at a time. And I am starting to see the things that I am thankful for inside my story. I am starting to see how conflict, that the desire of wanting something, is actually helping me tell a better story. I am starting to discover what it means to live.
Are you in a daydream right now? Or are you living your story?
What story are you telling?