Lately I have been in this mood of not really caring. I really don’t know where it is coming from. But it is nice to be able to just relax and not really care. As a child I was always able to entertain myself and make myself laugh. I still to this day make myself laugh all the time and usually it is stuff that a lot of people would not find funny. I really don’t know why I think it is funny but for some reason I can have the best time at the store just walking around and joking with myself and my Mom, and half the time she is not laughing, but like I said I really don’t care, I still have fun. I just don’t want to be one of those people who are so worried about what others think and cannot have fun with things. We went to target to do some Christmas shopping today and I was amazed at how every single girl that was in there looked alike. They were my age and younger and they all looked the same. I always tried to stay away from being the carbon copy of someone else, that is just one thing that would make myself laugh. another thing was when I went to get something to eat and the lady that took are order was so rude and depressing that I wanted to start to talk to her and try and cheer her up. It was sad to see this depressed look on her face and how much she hated her job. The funny thing is if I made a little comment to her she would look at me and give me this look like you are a loser and are pathetic. I sometimes feel like I don’t fit in with the average teenager these days. I am glad I am almost 20 so that I wont have to be a teenager any more.